fear.

I know overthinking can lead to a lot of problems like insecurity, depression, anxiety etc. But I just can't help it. Its like our minds are programmed into this systematic routine that we just have to daydream and overthink. Now, ever since Uni started for me, I could hardly ever get enough sleep. Or to be precise, I don't get to give my system a rest during the appropriate times for rest. My sleeping schedule is all over the place, sleeping at unruly hours like 1 or 2 am, which is kinda normal for most of the people I know in Uni, but not for me. I've just recently noticed, that my hair fall problem is getting worse by the day. If not mistaken, it started getting serious during trial exams last year, and recently the amount is just unacceptable. Just within a week of not seeing my mum, the moment I came back home, she was really shocked to see my hair thin out a LOT. Now, I might be paranoid about the fact I didn't cut my hair short this year, causing the hair fall a lot worse. I dunno. Maybe. But I think that sleep would be the main factor of my hair fall. I've started sleeping beyond 11pm ever since trials.

Sigh.

Just the other day I went a little too far, thinking that I might be sick. As in serious condition. As I recall, from American Horror Story, the Supreme also had major hair fall problems while she was diagnosed with cancer or some sort? That made me start getting scared. I really really hope that isn't the case for me. The moment that thought came to me, I started pouring out my tears and breathed heavily. I'm always a strong believer that when you keep thinking about or accepting the fact of something, it will eventually happen. So I hope the thought of this matter would just get off my mind as soon as possible. I most definitely wouldn't want that to happen.

I will be fine.

I will be fine.

I have things to do,

people to meet,

and most of all,

places to be.

I am not brought to this world,

to see such pain and sorrow,

but instead,

get some gain and look forward tomorrow.

Okay.

Positivity.

Now that my study week (aka holidays) have begun, I'm spending this week as therapy. Bought some books from BBW, spent the whole day playing Pokemon and I'm heading to Ipoh and Penang for the next few days for a mini getaway to visit my cousin. Hopefully I can get this off my mind. And I'm trying my best to sleep early during this holiday.